New Beginnings Floating on the Winds of Change

the feeling of Home

This past weekend was spent in Hutchinson, MN and I found myself in all of the familiar places, surrounded by my oldest friends. I felt a sense of belonging.

Have you ever felt that nostalgic sadness going back home after you’ve moved away?

It’s fall, the cold weather is creeping in. Colors changing and familiar smells settling in the unpredictable wind.

There is still this feeling of lostness tugging at my chest making it difficult to feel connected. Before I moved a few people warned me of these feelings and although I listened, I wasn’t prepared. It feels as though I’ve lost my community.

These feelings made this wedding that much more special as I knew I was bearing witness to this special matrimony as a bridesmaid. We spent the weekend in all of the local establishments, surrounded by old friends. It felt like I had never left.

And that’s when I realized something.

I don’t have to start all over, in fact, I am not. Instead, I’m adding to my already overflowing community…… it just takes time.

Identity in self versus finding it in others is probably one of my life’s biggest struggles.

When we are rooted in our beliefs, it doesn’t matter where we are because when you know what and why you behave certain ways it’s easier to hold on to your sense of self.

When I moved to Hutchinson 3 years prior, I didn’t know anyone but with time, I found myself surrounded by genuine people in volleyball teams, co-workers, and friends who were always right around the corner (literally). I’ve moved twice in the last 6 months and that’s so much change in such a short amount of time. A blessing in disguise, a test to my belief systems.

As I was reminiscing on all of these changes this year I remembered my most favorite memory of all. giving the Ridgewater College graduation speech.

What made my time there so special?

It inspired me to be a content creator. I found such a love for making videos, taking pictures and editing all of that together.

Even my friend Bobbie said during this wedding “Lilli, I think you like taking pictures.”

I said “Of course I do! Who doesn’t?”

She replied “No.. I think you really like taking pictures.”

Honestly, I was in my element all weekend. I freelance occasionally as an assistant for a florist for weddings but this weekend I was one of the florists AND an inside photographer AND a witness to one of my very best friend’s marriage.

It bought a cure.

The recipe:

Plants + Love + Friends X Inspiration + Joy + Freedom = A return to self.

Thank you for reading!

Lilliana LuCinda

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